INTERVIEW: Jenny Hawke

Jenny Hawke discusses her new book A Landscape of Grief, illuminated by Jenny’s poignant reflections and beautiful watercolour paintings …

When did you start painting watercolours?

I think I began around twenty or so years ago. My father Eddie Askew was a great artist and as he was getting older I thought I’d ask him to teach me how to paint with watercolours. Some people say watercolour as a medium is one of the hardest to paint with. I certainly think they are if you are a beginner.

I took lessons from him every time we visited him and Mum in Nottingham. We travelled up from London and Dad would demonstrate some techniques making it look so easy and simple. I’d ask him to then leave the room as I didn’t want him to watch me! It took me a while to relax into it and then ,as with everything, you just have to practice, and keep learning. Dad always had a very large wastepaper bin and encouraged me to not stress if a painting didn’t work out. Just throw it away and start again!

When you paint, or indeed write, where do you find your inspiration?

I guess it just depends on what is going on in my life at the time, what I’ve seen in the world around me that I’d like to paint. I live by the sea and I’m always happy to paint the sea. And as for writing, it’s often inspired by something someone has said that gets me thinking. I’ve learnt that I need to capture whatever thought that was on my phone immediately or I will forget it!

Why do you think painting and writing can help people navigate grief?

I think that grief is such an immense thing for anyone to experience and when we do so for the first time, losing someone close to us, we are overwhelmed by all the emotions. We struggle as to know what to do or how to go on with our lives so I believe that if we can hear the voice of someone who has walked that path before us, we may find help and a measure of peace.

Paintings to accompany any writing helps to engage the reader in a different way, so as a painter, I put my emotions into my paintings and hope that others can connect and feel as they look at my paintings.

What role has faith played in your grief journey?

My faith has certainly played a large part in my grief journey but perhaps not as I might’ve expected it to do. My faith was completely rocked by our experience of seeing my husband live through such a devastating disease. Normal prayers seemed to be empty. Church became a bit of a foreign land at times for me so over the following months I realised I needed to look again at what I believed and how I wanted to continue living out my life of faith. It has taken a long time to feel more comfortable with all the changes but I am still so aware of God as being an essential part of my life that I have to be satisfied with that. I can’t always put it into words or neat boxes but it is real, and I wouldn’t be without it.

How should people approach your new book, A Landscape of Grief, or, like coping with grief itself, is there no one way?

My hope for any reader is that they will find comfort in what I have written but above all, that they realise that are free to grieve however they want to, and for however long they need to. There are no rules and there is definitely no one way to walk this path. Trust yourself, be kind to yourself, and you will find your way.

What is your hope for readers of your book who are experiencing grief whether it be their own or that of someone close to them?

I have tried to be really honest about my experience with grief, which is ongoing, and I hope they will read with an open mind and find peace and a degree of companionship as they move through the book. Move through the book slowly. Give time to absorb, think, even share, and see where it takes you.

I still can hardly believe that it’s in my hands and I know my husband would be cheering me on.

I will be writing again soon but for the moment I am still adjusting to this new chapter of my life.

Jenny Hawke is a writer and watercolour artist. She has written and illustrated several books published by The Leprosy Mission, including Elephants in the Rush Hour and Are we Nearly There Yet, as well as three titles co-authored with her late father Eddie Askew.

A Landscape of Grief: Forty Reflections for the Journey by Jenny Hawke is now available in hardback, priced £9.99.