Introduction
‘In a world where you can be anything,
be kind.’ Jennifer Dukes Lee
Kindness is all
around us. Sometimes we just need to
make the effort to look for it. More
importantly, we should all make a conscious endeavour to be kind. To other people, to ourselves and to the
world.
For many individuals,
life is hard. There is a widening gap
between the rich and the poor in the UK.
The use of food banks has risen by a dramatic 73 per cent over the last
five years, with an estimated one in fifty households visiting a foodbank
between 2018-2019. One in four people will experience a mental health problem
each year, and statistics show that rates of loneliness have significantly
increased over the last decade. Despite the widespread use of the internet and
social media, which theoretically enhances connectivity around the world,
levels of community cohesion are low, and one in eight adults describe
themselves as having no close friends.
Work is often a
source of stress and unhappiness, and the World Health Organisation now recognises
burnout as an ‘occupational phenomenon’ characterised by feelings of
exhaustion, negativity, cynicism and reduced efficacy. Modern life places many
demands on our time, and it can be difficult to juggle all our commitments,
creating feelings of stress and anxiety.
What the world
needs now, more than ever, is for people to be kind. To show each other compassion and warmth. To bring happiness and joy to others. To do what benefits society and promotes the
best interests of all around us.
What is kindness?
There are many
different definitions of kindness. The
Cambridge Dictionary describes it as the
quality of being generous, helpful and caring about other people, or an act
showing this quality. According to
the Macmillan Dictionary, the word is derived from the old English word kyndes
and the Middle English word kindenes and has its origins in ‘nation,
produce, increase, noble deeds, courtesy’.
The great Greek philosopher Aristotle wrote that kindness is ‘helpfulness towards someone in need, not in return for
anything, nor for the advantage of the helper himself, but for that of the
person helped’. Kindness is at the core of most of the world’s religions.
In its simplest form, kindness is characterised by behaviours which are performed in a selfless
manner to improve the well-being of others and of the world.
Some scientists believe it was kindness that primed the
human species for language development.
When early humans started to prefer cooperative friends and mates to
aggressive ones, they started to become ‘tamer’. This was associated with the evolution of a
variety of physical and biochemical characteristics which were essential for
language formation.
Kindness can be recognised by babies as young as six months
old. Research has shown that infants
take into consideration an individual’s actions towards others in evaluating
that individual as appealing or aversive.
Babies prefer people who help others compared to those who hinder others
or are neutral. This capacity may play a
role in forming the foundations of moral behaviours, and its occurrence at such
an early stage in life supports the notion that social evaluation is a
biological adaptation.
Being kind is good for you
Acts of
kindness benefit everyone – the ‘giver’, the ‘receiver’ and society as a
whole. Research has shown that the performance
of selfless acts may have positive health benefits. A study looking at 1790 adults aged between
57 and 85 reported that those who participated in voluntary activities had
lower levels of C-Reactive Protein (CRP) in their blood. CRP is an indicator of inflammation and is
associated with chronic diseases such as hypertension, stroke and heart
disease. Volunteering has also been
linked to positive well-being, reduced symptoms of depression, improved
self-ratings of health and better control of blood pressure.
The significant
and positive effects of kindness can impact many domains of life: practising kindness has been found to reduce
social anxiety, it is associated with respect from others and may even reduce
the severity and duration of the common cold.
In one study, 142 individuals with social anxiety were randomly assigned
to conditions of performing kind acts, conditions to reduce negative affect/mood
or were in a control group. After four
weeks, the group performing kind acts were reported to have experienced
significant increases in positive affect/mood, to have improved relationship
satisfaction and reduced social-avoidance.
Kindness also
has a role to play in spending habits and well-being. Both children and adults who purchase goods
for others, or give treats away, experience greater happiness than when they
receive products themselves, illustrating the hedonic benefits of generosity.
While self-care
and self-kindness are fundamental components of well-being, interestingly, it
has been shown that pro-social or kind behaviours towards others result in
greater increases in psychological flourishing than do self-focussed
behaviours, meaning that to boost mood it is important for people to treat
others well.
In the healthcare
system, kindness has been described as ‘an essential ingredient … because the
emotion experienced by individuals when giving or receiving kindness can
provide the necessary courage to take action’. Kindness is associated with
increased levels of the ‘feel good’ chemical dopamine, which plays a role in
the experience of pleasure, reward and in motivation.
Implementing kindness: the ripple effect
Some people
seem to have an inherent desire and ability to be kind to others; it comes as
second nature without conscious thought.
This is likely the result of an incredibly complex interaction between
their genetics, the social environment they grew up in and their current life situation. For other people, kindness isn’t an innate
part of their being and it takes effort to perform kind behaviours. Kind acts do not need to be big, complicated
or extravagant. It is often the ‘small’
behaviours that can make a difference to someone else. For those who are not ‘naturally kind’
people, it can be helpful to begin with simple acts such as offering to make
someone a cup of tea, holding a door open, checking in on a friend or just
letting someone know that you appreciate them.
The wonderful
thing about kindness is that is has a ‘ripple effect’ – the recipient of a kind
act is likely to ‘pass it on’, so the spread of warmth and positive wellbeing
is enhanced. Research has shown that
individuals who receive acts of kindness experience higher levels of happiness
than controls, and that they are nearly three times more likely to engage in
prosocial acts than others. It is
evident that both givers and receivers benefit from kindness, and the effects
may be long-lived. One paper reported
that following a kindness intervention, there are short-term improvements in
wellbeing, for example in parameters such as autonomy and competence, but even
two months after the intervention has ended, receivers still continue to experience
happiness and givers may be less depressed and more satisfied with their jobs
and their lives. Practising kindness is emotionally reinforcing and contagious.
In addition to
practising kindness towards others, it is important to recognise, acknowledge
and to be grateful when you receive acts of kindness. It is all too easy to take kind acts for
granted, but reflection on, and appreciation of, kindness can further increase
psychological wellbeing and emotional resilience.
Summary
Kindness
describes behaviours which are performed in a selfless manner to
improve the well-being of others and of the world. Kindness has allowed the human species to
evolve and has significant positive effects for the giver, the receiver and for
society. Kindness can have a positive
impact on a vast range of physical and psychological parameters, including
blood pressure, depressive symptoms, emotional well-being and levels of
anxiety. Most importantly, being kind
spreads joy to others, and we should all strive to be the light wherever there
is darkness.
‘Be
kind whenever possible. It is always
possible.’ The 14th Dalai Lama
Kindness challenge
Make a
conscious effort to perform 50 kind acts over the next three months and to
recognise and appreciate kindness directed towards you. Think broadly – donate items to a food bank, check
in with an elderly relative, surprise someone with a delivery of a bunch of
flowers, volunteer for a charity or send a handwritten letter to an old friend.
It can be helpful to record the kind acts you have received, either in a
journal or on slips of paper in a jar, so that they can serve as a reminder to
you of the good in the world.
We’d love to
hear about your activities and to see you spreading love – please share and tag
us!
@dr_emmashort
#50actsofkindness
#kindness #kindnessrevolution
***
Each day, we
will post a short article by one of Darton, Longman and Todd’s amazing authors,
offering a personal reflection on our current situation in life. Sometimes this
will be written with reference to one of their books, and sometimes about how
they are living in response to the coronavirus and our current world situation.
We hope it will give you a taste of the depth and diversity of DLT’s list –
books for heart, mind and soul that aim to meet the needs and interests of all.
Today’s post is
by Dr Emma Short, an NHS doctor specialising in pathology, cancer and genetics,
and compiler of Smoothie Doctors, a fantastic collection of
smoothie recipes contributed by a team of practising doctors from around the
country, designed to bolster your everyday health and wellbeing, and to help
reduce the likelihood of being unwell. It will be published in 2021.
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