Lucy Mills considers how we can become
less forgetful …
Are you like
me? Do you spend hours and hours of your life forgetting the one you claim to
love the most? Do you grieve when you realise all that you have left behind as
you’ve become more and more distracted by other, mediocre things?
Remembering
God, for those such as us, can be a challenge. We have to keep on coming back,
keep on going over the basics, keep on reminding ourselves of a greater
reality.
For me, this has been a journey. I wrote a book about it, but that wasn’t journey’s end. I still need to remind myself to remember!
It’s hard to
summarise such an emotive theme with bullet points – but here are just a few
thoughts that might help us begin:
1. Get
to know yourself
As
individuals we, better than anyone, know what we have the most trouble with. We
recognise the things that consume our focus, the things that distract us most
easily. Understanding the way we work will also help us harness the positives –
realising how we learn, how we see the world will help us think creatively.
Don’t think that in order to be ‘spiritual’ you have to meet someone else’s
templates. We can explore ways of praying and reflecting on God and take note
of what we find most helpful – and nurture those aspects in our lives.
2. Make
a habit
We all have
rhythms of living. Some may be very structured, others more fluid. But within
these rhythms we form habits, not just of things we do but of how we think and
speak, our attitudes, our reactions. What habits help our spiritual lives? How
can we build on those and lessen the power of habitual distraction?
3. Associate
Association
is a powerful tool. We already do it, without thinking about it. There will be
all sorts of things that act as memory triggers for us – a place, an object, a
taste or a smell. What are the things we associate with seeking God? How can we
ensure we ‘trip over’ them regularly?
A physical
object can hold lots of associations. You could have a box of these. They can
be anything: something you used in a prayer activity at church, an object that
reminds you of a place where you had a new experience of God, a picture that
helps you reflect on God’s character. Keeping a journal is another way to ‘hold
onto’ what we learn in our lives of discipleship.
4. And,
breathe…
Make time to
rest. Often we fill our ‘rest’ times with distractions, just another kind of
busyness. Our brains get so used to being busy they don’t know how to stop;
it’s a real discipline to rest, to learn to slow down. We always feel we should
be doing, doing, doing. But even if it’s just 15 minutes occasionally in a day,
it’s good to teach ourselves to slow down and rest. Think about what you’re
choosing to do with your ‘downtimes’. It will be hard at first – you’re
breaking a brain-deep habit. But within these times of ‘soul quietness’ we can
once again learn to detect the still small voice. Rest is God’s invention; it’s
to be delighted in, not to feel guilty about!
5. Above
all: ask, and keep asking
We can’t do
this alone. I’m so forgetful of God in my life that sometimes I despair. And
yet despite my neglect, despite my spiritual flabbiness, despite my long
wanderings, God has never let me down. It’s God’s Holy Spirit who can give me
the strength to remember and so I ask (beg, grumble, whatever I may be feeling)
– change me, O Lord my God, and give me a
remembering heart. However fractured my memories become, however my mind may
fail me – give me a heart that always returns to you.
Lucy Mills is the author of Forgetful Heart:
Remembering God in a Distracted World,
available now in paperback and eBook.

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